18 Sep Matador Playlist 9/10/26 + Fab Four Metaphysics

What time is it, Gentle Reader(s)? No, it’s not Too Late, and it’s not Too Early. It’s the Right Time. More specifically, it’s time to get both numerological and philosophical. In this installment of Matador Playlist we shall address one of the Weighty Questions of Our Era. No, this question does not concern the looming threat(s) of our AI Overlords or global warming or the unrelenting horror of the current Goblinoid kakistocracy, although those are seriously weighty matters indeed. Instead we shall focus on a thorny matter that people from Arkansas to Alice Springs have been wrestling with since, oh, the mid-1950s at least: Ideally, how many members should a rock & roll band have?

I am pleased to inform you that, unlike the other pressing issues mentioned above, there is a simple and straightforward answer to the current question: Four.

Yep, that’s it: Four. The platonic ideal is, was, and will always be Four. As we all know, the Answer to Life, the Universe and Everything has been reliably calculated to be 42, but 42 musicians is a number better suited to a chamber orchestra than a rock & roll band. You can bank on it, folks: The correct answer is Four.

Why four? In the realm of rock & roll that’s really all that you should ever need. Not surprisingly, this platonic ideal is/was personified by the Beatles: Two guitarists, a bassist and a drummer. If, by some über miraculous coincidence of cosmic proportions, your quartet happens to comprise one of the greatest songwriting partnerships in the history of popular music AND, coincidentally, a few of the most talented rock & roll singers of all times, well, that doesn’t hurt the equation either. Some bands just have all the luck.

Staying within the confines of the classic quartet format one could shift the lineup to one guitarist, a bassist, a drummer and a singer. This arrangement has also worked pretty damn well (see: X, the Stooges, the Who, the Sex Pistols, Screaming Trees, Queen, Black Sabbath, Black Flag, Van Halen, Led Zeppelin, Joy Division, the Ramones, the Smiths, etc etc). Parsing it a bit further, one could tweak the lineup to have a guitarist, a drummer, a keyboard player and a singer, if the keyboardist has a left hand as dexterous as Ray Manzerak’s. The guitar/bass/drums/keyboard variant combo has proven to be pretty successful for ensembles as diverse as Pink Floyd and the Meters.

History has conclusively shown us that the five member format has achieved substantial success (see: the Rolling Stones, Oasis, AC/DC, Radiohead) and the trio format has also proven to be very durable over the years (see: Cream, Nirvana, Low, Morphine, the Jimi Hendrix Experience/Band of Gypsies, ZZ Top, Yo La Tengo, Rush, the Jam, the Minutemen, Motörhead). Getting down to basics, the duo format been shown to be quite adequately up to the task as well (see: the White Stripes, the Black Keys). Two-piece ensembles can be a real high-wire act depending on the concept and the instrumental dexterity of the band members, but when it works it just goes to show how far you can pare a talented rock & roll band down.

Heading in the opposite direction, at six members we have reached a critical rock & roll Rubicon. Six begins to strain credulity (that’s two Creams and three White Stripes!) and with anything over six we have definitively arrived at the doorstep of musical bombast (see: the Arcade Fire, Bruce Springsteen & the E Street Band). I saw the Arcade Fire in concert once and there was a good baker’s dozen or so of them up onstage. In addition to guitar/bass/drums there was someone pumping an accordion, a couple of percussionists banging away on kettle drums and glockenspiels and shit, maybe a tuba player and a small string section. I honestly can’t recall, because the whole thing was eminently forgettable and I have therefore forgotten about it. I do recall marveling over what a logistical nightmare it must be to take that big of an ensemble out on the road. Is it really necessary? What is the band aiming for? What is it covering up for?

And while we’re on the topic, does any band truly need three guitarists? I hate to break it to you Lynyrd Skynyrd, Wishbone Ash, Iron Maiden and Molly Hatchet fans, but the answer is an unequivocal No. Just… No. In recent years the Foo Fighters have also seen fit to transgress in this unfortunate direction, but since they’ve morphed into the Eagles for Millenials, I guess we shouldn’t be surprised.

Two drummers can be cool, but with that conceit we’re crossing over into Grateful Dead territory—a rarefied realm into which we dare not venture (the Allman Brothers and the Melvins notwithstanding).

As for percussion matters, any member of a competent rock & roll band should be able to shake a tambourine or some maracas or even—Lord help us!—whack a cowbell in addition to their primary job. If you don’t have a good enough sense of rhythm to handle that then you probably shouldn’t be in a rock & roll band in the first place! When you have a dedicated percussionist in a rock band situation you’re headed in the direction of Santana or something similar, which is totally cool but of a more specialized realm. In such instances congas players and such like are absolutely allowed, if not required.

What it comes down to is this: What is the least amount of instrumentation that a band should require in order to manifest their original material and best selves in a live setting? If a group’s studio recordings require a extensive roster of hired guns, guest instrumentalists, a symphony orchestra or six months of overdubbing to realize their sonic vision—then fine, no problem. Just keep an eye to the eventuality of going on tour and playing those songs to your adoring public. If they can be stripped down to a basic rock & roll format and still deliver the goods, then Bob’s your uncle. If not, well, Bob may be your brother-in-law.

There are exceptions to every rule, however, and as a notable case in point let us consider Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds. Historically, the Bad Seeds have been a five or six piece ensemble but on the road in recent years they have expanded to no less than eleven members—that’s 5 1/2 White Stripes, people! I saw them at the Barclays Center in New York in spring of last year and it was transcendent and utterly bombast-free—easily one of the best concerts I’ve ever seen, even in a hall that large.

So, this admittedly pokes a hole in my theory of rock & roll austerity espoused above. But, as Nick’s Covid-era film/album project Idiot Prayer conclusively proved, Saint Nick alone at a piano can get the job done more than adequately. Solo Nick: that’s 1/2 of a White Stripes! This is rock & roll—it’s not an exact science, or scientific at all for that matter. But while I still maintain that Four is the ideal I admit that it has more to do with the idea and the intent than the particulars of the execution. So bash away Arcade Fire and sturm und drang to your heart’s content E Street Band—all 17 of you! I just hope you pay your tour manager and your road crew a whole lot of money.

But enough, at last! You came here for a Matador Playlist and below you shall see it enumerated in all of its glory. As ever, you can access the YouTubeish manifestation of actual music by clicking your clickety device of choice right HERE. Check back again soon for further adventures in the realm of the pointless.

Matador Playlist 9/10/26

Grammar of Life – Charles Bukowski
Off Course – Thee Oh Sees
Riverside Jump – Jimmy Dale
Someday – the Strokes
Kyoto – Phoebe Bridgers
Pure & Easy – The Who
No Thugs In Our House – XTC
Hell Bent for Leather – Judas Priest
1969 – the Stooges
Lil’ Red – Bikini Kill
El Paso – Marty Robbins
TNT – AC/DC
Freedom! 90 – George Michael
Santa Fe – Zach Bryan
Caitriona – Protomartyr
Pluto – Björk
Monday – Wilco
Ready, Steady, Go – Generation X
Motel Room In My Bed – X
Use Me – Bill Withers
Just Like Heaven – Dinosaur, Jr.
Waitin’ for the Bus – ZZ Top
Jesus Just Left Chicago – ZZ Top
I Ain’t Got You – the Yardbirds
Iron Man – Black Sabbath
From a Motel 6 – Yo la Tengo
Soba Violence – Beastie Boys
Fast As You – Dwight Yoakam
Ballad of the Bootleg – Young Fresh Fellows
Nerve Jamming – Bass Drum of Death
Can’t Cheat Karma – Zounds
Teenage Head – the Flaming Groovies
Where It’s At – Beck
Froggie Went a’ Courting – Flat Duo Jets
The Swinging Man – Black Flag
Brown Eyed Handscome Man – Chuck Berry
Smalltown Boy – Bronski Beat
I’m Bored – Iggy Pop
Brainfreeze – Bully
(I Don’t Want To Go To) Chelsea – Elvis Costello & the Attractions
Pull Up To The Bumper – Grace Jones
Rowche Rumble – the Fall
Not Great Men (Phones Extended Version) – Gang of Four
Zombie Dance – the Cramps
In the Meantime – Helmet
Buddy Holly – Weezer
Never Say When – the dBs
Don’t Change – INXS
How Soon Is Now – the Smiths
Everybody’s Happy Nowadays – Buzzcocks
Mercy – the Collins Kids
Suburban Home – Descendents
London Calling – the Clash
Now Hear In – Cloud Nothings
Lost Mi Lover – Yellowman
Friday I’m In Love – the Cure
Heroes – David Bowie
Maps – Yeah Yeah Yeahs
All This And More – Dead Boys
Giant Peach – Wolf Alice
Relax-Ay-Voo – Dean Martin & Line Renaud
Petition the Lord With Prayer – the Doors
Dead Rats, Dead Cats – the Doors
Break On Through – the Doors
Fell In Love With A Girl – the White Stripes
Photograph – Def Leppard
Gold Lion (Diplo remix) – Yeah Yeah Yeahs (request)
Evil – Interpol (request)
Pale Shelter – Tears for Fears (request)
The Hippy Hippy Shake – the Swingin Blue Jeans
Hold On – the Alabama Shakes
Let’s Dance – David Bowie
I Can’t Stand It – the Velvet Underground (request)
I Fink You Freeky – Die Antwoord
Mandinka – Sinead O’Connor
Army of Me – Björk
Mezzanine – Massive Attack (request)
Where Eagles Dare – Misfits
Super Bad, Pts. 1 & 2 – James Brown
Nearly Lost You – Screaming Trees
God Save the Queen – the Sex Pistols
Fatty Boom Boom – Die Antwoord
World Without Tears – Lucinda Williams
Buona Sera – Louis Prima
Happy Trails – Roy Rogers & Dale Evans
Taxi – Bryan Ferry